The Steam Room

Ménage à Do or Don’t?

Why do you think people are so fascinated by the idea of a ménage relationship?

Ménage à trois!  The very word can cause any number of reactions.  Giggling, blushing, raised brows, arousal, outrage.  So, why do so many people fantasize such a controversial subject?

Do you dream about four hands caressing your body?  If you close your eyes can you imagine two mouths, two tongues worshiping you?

Ménage à trois literally means “household of three.”  I wanted to find out why this phrase drew so many readers to buy books so I questioned one hundred readers through Survey Monkey.  The results were pretty conclusive.  67% said they were fascinated by the “forbidden” aspect of a ménage relationship. 

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Personally, it is the idea of having more hands on me to heighten the senses. More attention. Being in a relationship where I am the one who has to be in charge most of the time, I would so love to just be able to lay back and have someone else worry about me and what I get from the experience, and not have to worry about being unfulfilled at the end.

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Because it's something they want to participate in, but it's unheard of or can't find them. I'd love to go to some of the towns that I read about and find 2 people to love that would love and treat me like they do in the book. Loved and secured.

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Because it is considered 'forbidden' in today's society. It is also, I believe, the ultimate in sexual fulfillment for women as we are so often disappointed...if you know what I mean! We have more than one erogenous zone and more hands, mouths, tongues and cocks means more than one area is receiving pleasure at the same time.

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I’m guilty of the same fantasies.  When I started writing “Table for Three” I rolled every fantasy I ever had into the story.  I was an older woman who’d survived an abusive first marriage who dreamed of starting over and finding young love again.  From this, I developed “Cass Abernathy.”

Table for Three         Buy and/or Read an Excerpt

Cass Abernathy is forty-three and she's getting a second chance at life, and maybe even love. She's finally divorced, after years of abuse, when she learns an unknown uncle in Oregon has left her his estate, and more importantly, his house. Filled with hope for her future and excited to have a place of her own, Cass heads west not knowing what she'll find.

What she finds are hot and sexy twin brothers intent on making her a part of their lives. It's too bad they're so much younger because they bring out feelings she's never had before.

Meanwhile, there's someone else interested in Cass' inheritance, and he's willing to do whatever it takes to make sure he wins.

Will Cass overcome her fears and open her heart to the two men who love her, and will she discover the truth about her inheritance before it's too late?

I’m happy to say I’ve lived a lot of my fantasies now, even though it was late in life.  I will say I never experienced twin brothers, but I am happily living with my husband who is a decade younger than me.  Even that little bit of departure from normal can get some people in a snit.  Why are some people so threatened by alternative lifestyle relationships?  What is it they fear?

I have a friend who openly lives in a ménage F/M/F relationship.  She’s not bisexual; she merely “shares” her husband with another woman.  They live in the same house, sleep in the same bed, and raise their children side-by-side.  I asked her once why she would share the love of her life.  Since she’s not involved in a romantic relationship with the other woman, what would the advantages be?  She said, “Our house is always full of love.  Even if two of us are having problems, our children always have a parent they can turn to for love and guidance.  I never worry if anything should happen to me because I know my girls will always have a mother.”

I, for one, can’t imagine a life with that much inner peace.  I asked her if jealousy had ever been a problem.  She said, “In the beginning, we’d get our panties in a wad if one of us got a better birthday or Christmas gift. <she laughed>  Then, David wised up and started getting us similar, if not identical things for special occasions.  <she shrugged, and then sighed>  I really don’t think it’d be a problem now.  Everybody feels how much we love each other so nobody would ever get their feelings hurt.”  When I asked her what she could possibly find to fantasize about since she was living so many other people’s idea of a perfect life.  She grinned and said, “Having a house with four bathrooms!”

My friend is living in a relationship with one man and another woman.  The other side of the coin gives us relationships with two men and one woman.  In the survey I did, people seemed to think this type of relationship was more scandalous, and yet 68% of the hundred readers said this was the type of ménage they most liked to read.

My fantasies always ran to having two men making love to me.  The thought of all those hands and lips made me crazy.  Then, I read my first M/M romance and suddenly began to fantasize about two men making love to me, and to each other at the same time.  In all the books I’d read up to this point, the men never touched, they concentrated all their energies on the woman.  And believe me, when you have three people in a bed, making love, it’s not easy to keep the men from touching!

I bought my first M/M/F ménage about six months before I wrote the sequel to “Table for Three.”  I decided I wanted to try my hand at writing a ménage story that didn’t have any restrictions about the love scenes.  “Catch Her When She Falls” was born.

Catch Her When She Falls           Buy and/or Read an Excerpt

Serena Dammler is recovering from a savage beating and needs protection. Cowboys and lovers Marc Weller and Tony Estabon are taking jobs as bounty-hunters, and their newest assignment is to capture her attacker and return him to Texas. They take one look at Serena’s fragile beauty and decide she’d be the perfect third to their family.

Serena’s always dreamed of catching herself a rich man, and she’d do just about anything to make that dream come true. She’s not going to allow herself to fall in love with her two cowboy protectors, no matter how sexy they are.

Marc and Tony want Serena as their third, but they want her love to be real and not based on their bank accounts. So what will it hurt if they take her to a little cabin on their ranch and pretend to be simple cowboys?

I was a little nervous writing my first M/M scenes, and quite frankly, had no idea what I was doing.  I did a lot of reading, and even consulted a writer I consider to be one of the tops in M/M writing.  Stormy Glenn read my passages and gave me some invaluable advice in making my love scenes more realistic.

“Catch Her When She Falls” turned out to be my best seller as of this date.  Yet, when I surveyed the hundred readers, 100% of them stated they’d prefer reading M/F/M ménages over M/M/F!  What does that tell you?  It tells me that some people will never be comfortable admitting what type of romance novel turns them on.

Do I yearn for a ménage lifestyle?  No, I’m happy with my young husband.  I don’t think society is ready for people living in open ménage relationships, yet.  I do think the day will come when you’ll be able to find the perfect Hallmark Card for congratulating the union of a ménage couple.

Check out Missy's Website at  www.missymartine.com